Hello Trees, Hello Sky!

[QueenBee]

Oooh I've seen that one before.. it's magnificent.

[Veggie Delite]

yeah, and ultra-stable

[kishkash]

OMG that is totally kewl ... its like my laptop with Windows ME...except i have a few more programs

*goes to send Windows RG to all my friends*

[ypsidan04]

LenochkaO: Good thread idea. I dont like conflict either.

I intend to live forever - so far, so good.

What has 4 legs, and 1 arm? A rottweiler

Lady, this vacuum cleaner will cut your work time in half!
Good! I'll take two of them.

What did the Buffalo say to her son before his first day of school?
Bison.

Dad, would you do my homework for me?
No, son. It just wouldn't be right.
Well, maybe not. But give it a try anyway.

The only reason I'd take up jogging is so I can hear heavy breathing again.

Sex on television is harmless, unless you fall off.

A man walks up to a blind man, and hands him a piece of matzah. The blind man says, "who wrote this nonsense?"

If you could have a conversation with someone, living or dead, who would it be?
I'd choose the one that's living.

Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups. (i.e. the Bush administration)

I said no to drugs, but they just wouldn't listen

[Veggie Delite]

a salesmen rings at a door, a women opens it. he immediatly rushes in, spreds some dirt, seeds, dog-hair, etc on the carpet.
-ok, now look. now if this vacuum-cleaner won't clean up this mess without any trails, i'll personally lick everything from this carpet...
-ok, then. wan't any catchup on it...? the electricity is gone...

[ypsidan04]

Originally posted by $in
a salesmen rings at a door, a women opens it. he immediatly rushes in, spreds some dirt, seeds, dog-hair, etc on the carpet.
-ok, now look. now if this vacuum-cleaner won't clean up this mess without any trails, i'll personally lick everything from this carpet...
-ok, then. wan't any catchup on it...? the electricity is gone...

Originally posted by ypsidan04
Yulia answered a knock on the door one day, only to be confronted by a well-dressed young man carrying a vacuum cleaner.

"Good morning," said the young man. "If I could take a couple minutes of your time, I would like to demonstrate the very latest in high-powered vacuum cleaners."

"F*ck off!" says Yulia. "I haven't got any money" and she tried to close the door. Quick as a flash, the young man wedged his foot in the door and pushed it wide open.

"Don't be too hasty!" he said. "Not until you have at least seen my demonstration." And with that, he emptied a bucket of horse crap all over her hallway carpet. "If this vacuum cleaner does not remove all traces of this horse crap from your carpet, Madam, I will personally eat the remainder."

"Well," she said, "I hope you've got a f***ing good appetite, because the electricity was cut off this morning."

That's a good joke.

[Veggie Delite]

ehm.. was it already posted...?

sorry then

[teeny]

ehm.. was it already posted...?

In the tatu jokes thread.. still a good one though

[Veggie Delite]

missed that one...

[QueenBee]

Oh, oh! I have a riddle I think you've heard it before, but it took me aaages to figure it out! Actually, someone told me the answer.

What is greater than God,
More evil than the devil?
The poor have it,
The rich need it,
And if you eat it, you die?

[teeny]

answer: "nothing"

wu hu.. I'm good

[QueenBee]

This guy was in an airplane and he really had to go to the bathroom but the mens stall was occupied and would be for a long time. So, the next time the flight attendant came a long he told her she said that he could go into the ladies bathroom but she warned him not to push any of the buttons. So he went in. he sat down on the pot and was looking at the buttons that the flight attendant told him about. They said:

W AD P ATR

He thought oh well ill just try one. so he pressed the W button and it washed his bottom with nice warm water. So he thought woo that felt good so he pressed the AD button and it Air Dried his soggy butt. He was thinking, these women really have it good so he pressed the P button and the toilet brushed his bottom with powder. So a little more daringly he pressed the ATR button.

The next day he woke up and he was in the hospital. A nurse walked in and he asked what had happened. she said, you should have listened to the flight attendant not have pressed any bottons because you pressed the Auotomatic Tampon Removal button...

Tina.. boo.. you weren't supposed to know..

[teeny]

Tina.. boo.. you weren't supposed to know..

sorry, I'm smart.. what can I say? :P naaa I think it was included in Diablo II or Baldurs Gate II. One of those at least.

nice one, QB

[Veggie Delite]

eeewwww....
u r young qb, u'r not supposed to know jokes like this...!

[teeny]

u r young qb, u'r not supposed to know jokes like this...!

In 3. grade my teacher had to censor my jokes for the school newspaper That is after she had written them down herself

[QueenBee]

Once, there was a dark, dark universe.
And in this dark, dark universe, there was a dark, dark galaxy.
And in this dark, dark galaxy, there was a dark, dark solar system.
And in this dark, dark solar system, there was a dark, dark planet.
And on this dark, dark planet, there was a dark, dark country.
And in this dark, dark country, there was a dark, dark city.
And in this dark, dark city, there was a dark, dark neighborhood.
And in this dark, dark neighborhood, there was a dark, dark street.
And at the end of this this dark, dark street, there was a dark, dark house.
And in this dark, dark house, there was a dark, dark room.
And in the corner of this dark, dark room, there was a dark, dark closet.
And in this dark, dark closet, there was a dark, dark jacket.
And in this dark, dark jacket, there was a dark, dark pocket.
And in this dark, dark pocket,












... was a pink jellybean.

[Veggie Delite]

http://www.ebaumsworld.com/celebgay.html

[QueenBee]

$in, that was cool.. People always forget you have a bellybutton.. *rolls eyes*

Oh btw, ebaumsworld ROCKS!

[QueenBee]

There are two types of people in the world: those who remember things very easily and... uh.

[ypsidan04]

Originally posted by QueenBee
$in, that was cool.. People always forget you have a bellybutton.. *rolls eyes*

Oh btw, ebaumsworld ROCKS!

That was interesting, $in.

I can't believe you just said that! Cudjew do me a big favor, and join the forum there? I need more Tatu fans there, dammit! I'm the only voice in the crowd! ($in too) - Thanks.

(but I warn you, there are some people there who aren't afraid to speak their mind.)

Seeya around, hopefully.