[setsuna22]

Lena felt tears begin to fall down her cheeks. Yulia had promised. Why was she doing this? Nothing was said as Sergi and his father stared blankly at Yulia, who kneeled down before Lena.
“I had to. There was no other way to stop it, Lena. You can hate me if you want, but I had to stop this. I care about you too much. “ Her hands reached out to gently touch Lena, who ripped away from her.
“You’re just like them!” she spat out. “I feel violated all over again.” She shoved her chair away and got up, leaving the room.
Lena braced her head against her hand as the phone rang off the hook for the twenty third time this morning. It had been two days since she had left the school and left Yulia, who has been calling every hour on the hour since then. She couldn't talk to her. She just didn't have the strength to deal with this any more. She just wanted the world to disappear and leave her in peace. The phone rang again. A tear trickled down her cheek as she reached down and yanked the cord from the plug disconnecting the phone. It almost physically hurt her to pull the only connection Yulia had to her but...she just didn't know anymore.
There was a soft tap at the door. Before she could reply, the door swung open to reveal Yana.
“You okay, Lenika?”
Lena merely shook her head and continued to look at the apartment window from her seat. Yana sat down heavily beside her.
“I know you’re hurting. And not just from what Sergi did to you.”
Lena said nothing and Yana sighed.
“Yulia did what she did because she cares about you.”
“I begged her not to tell.” Lena choked out softly.
“What happened wasn’t your fault, Lena. Sergi is a bastard who, thanks to Yulia, WILL go to jail.”
Lena didn't hear her. All that she knew was, in her heart, Yulia had betrayed her.
“She loves you.” Yana said simply. Lena blinked through her tears and stared at Yana, as if she had just awoken in a different time.
“She loves you, Lena.” Yana repeated. “When you were sick, she almost couldn't function. I don't even know her but, I know she loves you. She would do anything for you.”
“She's just my friend. Or so I thought.”
“Look! “ Yana said standing up. “You can tell yourself whatever you want. You can deny the fact that Sergi was abusive to you or that someone thinks you are the most amazing person on the planet and that she could love you. But just because you don't admit it isn't going to make it real. Bad things happen to good people Lena. But so do amazing things. Yulia is one of those things. You should take what you can get and hold onto her like hell. Because those amazing chances are hard to come by.” She left the room too upset to look at her sister, leaving Lena to her thoughts.
Yulia felt as if she couldn't breath. For three whole days, she had gone without seeing Lena. It felt like a lifetime. She pushed herself harder as she ran around the outside of the track, trying to blur the world with speed. God, she never thought she would hurt so badly. A pressure had settled into her lungs and was passing at her, making her short of breath and her heart pound in her ears. What was left of her heart anyway? She barely knew Lena, yet the past few days had been something she would never understand. She had lived to make Lena happy and she herself had never been more fulfilled. She stopped running and bent over her hands on her knees as she squeezed her eyes shut. She didn't know how to deal with it.
An empty space that she had thought she could fill when her parents died was wider than ever. And no matter how much she told herself that it didn't matter as long as Lena was happy she would be okay - she wouldn't. She pulled herself up and dragged her fingers through the sweat soaked tresses. She almost fainted. She blinked several times to make sure it wasn't some kind of mirage seeing Lena standing only feet away. Close enough to touch.
“I'm sorry. I was upset. I still don't even know what I want...“ Lena stopped as she struggled for words, the flow that had started ebbing. She didn't know what she wants because she didn't even know who she was. But something felt right between her and Yulia. Even though she wasn’t lesbian or even bisexual. She felt something that she couldn’t even begin to put into words. Yulia waited as Lena held her breath and took a step forward. Two feet separated them.
“I care about you, Yulia...” Lena bit her lower lip, studying Yulia, praying for some kind of reaction that wasn’t rejection. Lena closed her eyes as she searched inside of herself struggling to find the words. Her eyes opened again, staring straight into the blue eyes that had saved her time and again and she said the words Yulia was praying for.
“I want to be with you.”
Yulia crossed the bridge of the two feet separating them, pulling her arms around Lena. And clenching her tight. Lena clung on just as hard, begging to whoever decided fate not to rip them apart.
The bright sun filtered through the trees as Yulia and Lena sat on a Moscow park bench having a picnic. Yulia cut through another thick homemade sandwich and offered it to Lena, who smiled and shook her head.
It had been three weeks since Sergi got arrested after Yulia had called the police. Sergi had confessed and was now serving two to five years in prison. Since then, Lena had slowly started to get better. She was in no way healed, but the connection between the two girls had deepened. And they both relied on the other.
Lena studied Yulia as she smiled and bit into the sandwich, distracted for a moment.
“She really cares about me.” Lena thought tenderly “She wants to take care of me. Why?”
She blinked.
“What?”
Yulia became concerned as she saw the look that had passed over Lena's face.
“I asked if you wanted something else?”
“What did you bring?”
Yulia hoisted the huge basket into her lap and rummaged through it, Lena peering over the side of the huge basket.
“Caviar, bread, cheese...”
Lena shook her head negatively again.
“No, thank you.”
“How about.... mhmmmm... cake? Vodka.... cookies... more vodka or.... more vodka?”
“No, I'm okay.” Lena sat back against the bench.
“Thanks for inviting me today”
Yulia waved a hand dismissively as she dug through the basket.
“It's nothing. Ohh. Wait, how about this?”
She pulled out a small white Tupperware container and pulled off the lid and handed it to Lena, who stared into the container and got choked up.
Watermelon.
Somehow, Yulia had managed to get watermelon - it was de-seeded and cut into small bite size squares. It was what Lena had told Yulia was her idea of heaven in a bowl. But didn't eat it much because it was expensive to buy and usually they were never very ripe.
“Thank you.” she said softly, holding the bowl close to her chest like it was the crown jewels.
Yulia only nodded and for several minutes, neither one spoke as Lena slowly savored the fruit; it was perfect. She bit into another piece and juice ran down over her mouth. She felt Yulia's eyes watching her. She slowly raised her eyes, pulling the uneaten portion from her mouth. Yulia reached up before she could stop herself and brushed the trickle of juice away from Lena's chin. Lena felt her breath catch as Yulia pressed closer, her lips brushing delicately against her mouth. The touch so faint it made her wonder if she felt it.
“Lena. I wanted to ask you, if you would like to go to the dance with me next week, but I understand if you don’t want -”
“Yes.” Lena interrupted.
Yulia blinked and stared at her not believing, wondering if she heard her correctly.
“I want to go with you.” Lena said, lightly touching Yulia's cheek, her own face flushed with anticipation as she bent closer and returned Yulia's kiss, moving it slowly deeper.
Yulia put her hands around Lena. The moment was fragile but for the world for those few seconds were perfect.

Lena stared at herself in the mirror and for once, she saw herself the way others did. Her red lustrous hair had been curled and then pinned elaborately to her head, the curls escaping around her face and neck, small gems with Velcro had been attached to her hair. She wore a full taffeta silver shirt that reached to the top of her feet and a white corset style top that had silver piping for the laces and decoration. Around her neck, she wore a slinky silver chain that held a single diamond pendant and long dangly silver earrings hung from her ears. She took an even breath. The only one who knew she was even going to the dance was Yana. Her parents would eventually not care if she went with Yulia. But since Sergi had gotten arrested, they were treating her like a china doll - something she hated.
“You look amazing.” She turned around to where Yana was standing in the doorway, a tentative smile came to her lips.
“Thanks.”
“You look nervous.” Yana came forward as Lena turned back to the mirror, fixing a few stray curls with sprits of hair spray.
“I am.”
“Don't be. Lena, people are going to think or assume what they want, no matter what. Don't let people’s ignorance and fear dictate who you are going to be, or who you’re going to love.”
Lena didn't say anything. She merely turned and hugged her sister tight. Besides Yulia, Yana was one of the only people that helped her put things in perspective. There was a soft knock at the door.
“You better go.”
Lena nodded and went to answer the door, and her destiny.
Yulia stood on the other side of the door and waited less than ten seconds before the door opened. The light filtered around Yulia and Lena felt light headed. Yulia was dressed in a straight black skirt and blood red sheath top. Several inches of bare stomach showed between the gap of the top and skirt. Her black hair was in a low side part and sprayed with glitter hair spray. Her only jewelry was a thick black and red beaded choker, the black ribbon ties falling down her bareback. Yulia smiled and stepped into the doorway as Lena invited her in. Yulia slid a reassuring hand around her waist and Lena flushed slightly, a soft blush staining her cheeks at the newness of Yulia's attention as she kissed Yulia's cheek.
Yana smiled as she came in from the kitchen with a camera.
“Smile.”
Yulia and Lena turned their heads and smiled softly, both unsure if they really wanted pictures.
“We better get going. We’re already an hour late.”
Yulia nodded and slid her hand through Lena's as they headed out the door. It was silent in the elevator. Yulia sensed Lena's nervousness. She brought her hand up to her mouth and kissed the back of the smooth hand. Lena smiled; Yulia watched as the tension visibly drained from her body. The ride to the banquet hall where the dance was being held was swift and uneventful and they were soon standing in the doorway of the huge room filled with all of their peers.
Yulia gave Lena a look and almost cracked up. This was so stupid. Who gave a damn about them going together? People over the last three weeks had begun to speculate anyway and people were going to think what they wanted.
“Do you want to get something to eat first or do you want to dance?”
Lena shrugged and looked around the room. Some people were openly staring while others just watched out of the corner of their eye, but one thing was for sure - everyone was watching.
“We might as well go dance since that seems to be what everyone is waiting for.”
Yulia laughed as she saw two couples flush, that were closest to them to hear the remark, who instantly turned inward and started talking among themselves. Yulia let go of Lena's hand, slid an arm lightly around her waist, and gave it a gentle squeeze. Lena tilted her head back and smiled at Yulia, who was taller than her at the moment in tall heels. She smiled unconcerned and brushed a stray lock of hair from the girl's forehead. They walked around the outside of the room, away from the tables and crowds of people onto the corner of the dance floor.
“I can't believe this.” Lena muttered under her breath as she wrapped her arms around Yulia and sunk into her embrace. Yulia laughed.
“Why can't you believe it?”
“Because, it’s stupid just to stare at us like that.” Yulia's smile flashed wider.
“It’s not us they are staring at. It's you.” Lena pulled back slightly in Yulia's arms, searching her face.
“Why are they staring at me?”
“Because you’re beautiful.” Yulia replied, her dark blue eyes holding the green orbs seriously. Lena didn't give a damn about what other’s thought, but at that moment she did feel beautiful - only because Yulia had said it.