Fortunately - Unfortunately
 

Right, another simple game here (last one for today, promise):

I'll start by saying:

Tanya is a very nice girl.

The next person will say:

Unfortunately she doesn't have a brain.

3rd person says:

Fortunately there is a new medicine that can help her.

Unfortunately it's very rare...

Understand? Keep alternating between Unfortunately and Fortunately. And stick to the story, don't start a new one suddenly, ok?

Here we go:

Simon was walking down the street, tomorrow he'd have to move to Italy

Fortunately...italy is quite mild this time of year

Offtop:
for TODAY??? :bum:

Fortunately - Italy is quite mild this time of year.

Unfortunately - its culture saw its best days about 2000 years ago.

Fortunatly there are lots of historic creations left to enjoy.

unfortunately - Simon didn't seem to care about this as he was uncultured to tha MAX

Fortunatly Simon was rich and didn't have to study history or go to school at all.

Unfortunately this had left Simon somewhat smug and ignorant to the true nature of reality.

fortunately - simon was funny as hell so his ingnorance and arrogance would never be seen

unfortunately - people didn't really think he was all that funny so he cried.

Fortunately his father was a boss of the tissue manufacturing complany, so Simon had plenty of tissues to wipe his tears. :lol:

unfortunately - he was allergic to tissues...and started to bloat up in a rather odd and scary fashion

[stop deleting posts damn u! *shakes fist*]

Fortunately there was a doctor boarding Simon's plane...

unfortunately - this doctor was the unqualified and slightly moronic character from the simpsons, Dr. Nick

Fortunately there was a sexy nurse accompanying Dr. Nick.

unfortunately - the nurse was also underqualified as she literally just got her toothpicking pickers liscence

Fortunately Simon's allergy calmed down for the time being.

Damn it, I'm too slow!!!! *shakes fist at mind* Think faster!!!! Anyway....

Unfortnately the unqualified nurse forgot about his reaction and wiped his face with another tissue, trying to help him clean up.

Fortunately the plane security didn't let the underqualified medical personel on board. :gigi:

Unfortunately Simon's bloating left diminished seat room for his neighbouring passengers. Hence they were enraged and pummeled his face using a variety of karate moves.

fortunately simon was already out and unconscious as his airway had been blocked by the extreme swelling of his windpipe from the repeated tissue exposure

Unfortunately Simon's fellow passengers were trying to revive him so he could feel the weight of their wrath.

Fortunately, Simon was wearing four extra jumpers so as to not have to pay excess baggage. Therefore, when they woke him, he could barely feel their blows.

Unfortunately the four extra jumpers were somewhat constricting and the horrible swelling began to make them split under the strain.

Fortunately Simon's mom came onto the plane and asked him to go home with her.

Unfortunately Simon's mom had enjoyed an incestuous relationship with her son for the last four years and her insatiable sexual appetite meant that his fragile psychological state was to be imperilled yet again.

Fortunately Simon's dad has filed a restriction order to keep his wife away from Simon.

Unfortunately, she had clearly broken that restriction, as she was now on the plane asking Simon to come home with her.

Fortunately Simson was now a teenager, and since his mom abused him when he was very young, he didn't recognise her. She was just a hot woman to him.

Unfortunately, Simon's childhood trauma had left him permenently unable to sustain an errection, so he felt inadaquate in the face of his mother's amorous advances.

Fortunately his mother found a medicine to cure his erection problem, cuz she wanted some action. :gigi:

Unfortunately, Simon's mother - Simone's - voracious sexual appetite meant that she overdid it somewhat and started to feel sudden knifing pains in her chest.

Fortunately she realised early on that it were her breat implants - their change date was overdue.

Unfortunately Simon panicked, dismounted his mother as fast as Frankie Dettori after winning the Prix de l' Arc de Triomphe, and in so doing cracked his head open against the bedside table.

Fortunately Simon had a long-lost brother, Solomon, and after getting her breats fixed, his mother Simone went to look for him.

Unfortunately, Simone's narcissism meant that she paid no attention whatsoever to Simon's cracked head, so some 3 days later he lay in the same spot - dead from his injuries.

Fortunately Simon had a really cool funeral at which everyone got something nice to eat and drink.

*I'm so cold blooded*

Unfortunately, prawns were on the buffet menu (you've always got to be careful with seafood, you know) and Simon's brother Solomon went down with a nasty case of food-poisoning, leaving him unable to sate Simone's nocturnal desires.

Fortunately Simone's father, Salvador, was in town for the funeral of his grandson, and although he was *smaller*, Simone was willing to go to this great extent to satisfy her desires...

*Lol. One big, happy family we are making up, arn't we? :lol: *

Aside: Which reminds me of the sick quip - moderators, feel free to delete - I came from a really close family: I always knew when my sister had her period because you could taste the blood on Dad's dick. I know....terrible.