I'll Never Tell... (New) Chapter 1 part 1

[tatu_rocs]

i would fuckin kick the shit out of that asshole!! lena better

[teeny]

yeah more people arrived in here.. I was just about to suggest that if only I read it anyway that I could do it at tatu . us.
Now I can read it in here.. *yay*

Lena should get her hands on Michael.. I agree with, veggie.

[haku]

Originally Posted by teeny

I was just about to suggest that if only I read it anyway that I could do it at tatu . us.

Oh no, it's safer here, well, for me anyway, lol, i couldn't post my views over there. I have that damn blue symbol next to my avatar that would give me away. The other posters would ripped my balls off and tear my dick to pieces along with Michael's.

[vicky7]

Hi guys! It's so nice to see a bit more life in here. Thanks for joining us haku, it's always a pleasure and don't worry this story will always be posted in here as well as the other place because of the diversity of the comments. The people off the two forums couldn't be more different could they? Not that it is a bad thing. But enough of my rambling thanks for the comments and here's an update xxx


Chapter 3 part 4


“Is Yulia here?” Lena asked frantically as she saw a pensive Alex sat at the kitchen table.

Alex nodded, his eyes barely meeting Lena’s. “Yes, Anna’s with her now.”

“Oh, good.” Lena said about to leave the room to go up to Yulia.

However, Alex stood up and blocked her way to the door. “Lena, please come and sit down.”

“But I want to talk to Yulia.” Lena made to side step him but he grabbed her by the arm and gently sat her down onto the sofa.

“She doesn’t want to see you right now.”

“But…” Lena started.

“Anna phoned The Brights,” Alex continued, “they’ve said it’s ok for you to go and stay over at their house tonight.”

“But why?” Lena was shocked, no matter how badly behaved she had ever been, she had never been sent away for the night, what did Yulia think she had done?

“Yulia’s really upset.”

“I know that, that’s why I want to be here.” Her green eyes met his pleadingly, she never asked him for anything if she could help it but she desperately wanted to be allowed to stay at home with Yulia. “Please Alex, I’m begging you.”

“I’m sorry Lena, but she doesn’t want you to be here, she’s extremely angry with you.”

Lena recoiled as if he had slapped her, Yulia didn’t want her to be there? But they were always together, always. They had been together every night since they were five, why should tonight be any different, she hadn’t done anything wrong. “But I didn’t give Michael the picture, I wouldn’t do that.”

“I know,” Alex acknowledged, the merest glint of sympathy shining in his dark eyes. “But Thomas did.”

“Oh god, no.” Lena said covering her mouth with her hand, she had suspected as much but the fact Yulia was suffering because of one of the practical jokes she had been an accomplice to, made her feel all the worst. She could have stopped this happening but she didn’t, perhaps in truth she enjoyed seeing the pictures so much, she was a pervert.

Alex looked at her with a mixture of sadness and disappointment. Privately he defended Lena regularly when Anna complained about her behaviour but he was growing tired of fighting the cause for someone who never rewarded the faith he put in her. “I just can’t believe how foolish you have been.”

“Foolish?”

“Yes, foolish,” Alex re-emphasised, “giving Thomas that camera, encouraging him.”

“It was just a bit of fun.”

“Tell that to Yulia, how would you feel if you were her?” He challenged her, wishing she would just apologise for her role in the saga instead of always being so defiant.

Lena disappointed him yet again. “I can’t answer that.”

Alex gave up, she was as selfish as Anna said she was and he wanted nothing more for her to hurry up and get out of his sight. “Anna’s packed you a bag to take with you to The Brights, they’ll be expecting you anytime.”

“Can I go to see Tommy before I go?” Lena asked noting Alex’s defeated expression. He was a good man but weak, always letting Anna get her way, she found it hard to respect him for that.

“Alright but don’t go into Yulia, ok?”

“Ok Alex, I won’t.” Lena nodded averting her gaze just in case he could read in her eyes that she was lying.

As she stood on the landing Lena was torn between going to her own room to see Yulia and going to see Thomas. In the end, she managed to resist the urge to go to Yulia as she needed to speak to Thomas first.

“Tommy, it’s Lena, let me in matey.” She called through the locked door.

Thomas quickly let her in, glad to see someone who wasn’t going to shout at him, at least he hoped. “What you been doing Tom? Why did you give that picture to Michael?” Lena asked, purposely trying to sound calm. She didn’t feel angry with the little boy; she never could no matter how naughty he was.

“He gave me a fiver for it.” Thomas smiled victoriously.

“When?

“Saturday when he picked up Yulia.”

“You’ve caused so much trouble by doing that, Yulia’s really upset.” Lena informed him, hoping that he would indicate that he was harbouring some feelings of guilt, but it appears his conscience was clear.

“Don’t care, nobody like her now so good!” He pouted childishly. “I hate her, she’s stupid!”

“Hey, Tommy! Don’t say that! Yulia isn’t stupid! She’s really not and I don’t like her being upset, it upsets me too.”

Thomas’ large blue eyes filled with tears of resentment. “I don’t want to upset you Lena but I still hate her! She gets everything she wants, clothes and shoes and comics, it’s not fair! Anna and Alex don’t love me because of her!”

“That’s not true Tommy, it’s not,” Lena struggled to defend her foster parents, they really weren’t as interested in them as they were in Yulia, they worshipped her but how could she tell Thomas he was right? “It’s just Yulia has lived with them longer than us. ”

“Only a year more than you but they don’t love you either Lena do they?”

Lena gulped hard. “I dunno Tommy, I really don’t. But you know it doesn’t matter because I have you and Yulia, I only need you two. I guess, what I’m trying to say is, that, that I love you…” she stammered. Those words always made her feel particularly vulnerable; the people she loved always went away.

Thomas’ anger was replaced by hope touching Lena to the verge of tears. “You do?” Lena never cried but she couldn’t help but think that if she didn’t love this little boy, nobody else would. He was like her, one of nature’s underdogs, he was as scarred by life as she was, all they wanted was to be loved but it seemed unattainable.

“Yes, you’re my baby brother.” She said cuddling his chubby body to hers.

“I wish we could live somewhere else,” Thomas pondered with his head in her wild curls. “Maybe on a farm with lots of cows and sheeps and chickens and monkeys!

“You can’t have monkeys on a farm!” Lena laughed, grateful for some light relief.

“You would on my farm!”

“Oh Tommy, what am I going to do with you?”

[teeny]

Originally Posted by haku

I have that damn blue symbol next to my avatar that would give me away.

lol.. I even had to go check which you were talking about thought a tatysite icon was introduced or something. Don't think they would be that bad, haku. And I would defend you somewhat if they started. Cos I have the opposite symbol and all..

That being said: glad it will be posted in here Cos I do prefer the light background when reading longer texts.

And Thomas should stop and think just once in a while before doing stuff in the future

[haku]

Originally Posted by teeny

thought a tatysite icon was introduced or something.

Hehe, that would be kinda funny if tatysite members were "marked" over there, lol.

Originally Posted by teeny

Don't think they would be that bad, haku.

Well, not all of them, but having male parts is not safe over there, they often get maimed in various ways as i'm sure you've noticed, lol, especially in the fic section. I was reading a thread earlier and i saw that someone had an avatar which said "boys are stupid, throw rocks at them", oooookay... That gives an idea of the ambiance over there.
I mean, it's never easy to be a male on a Tatu forum, 90% of the members are female and most of them are not really fond of males, lol, but the environment is much friendlier here.

Originally Posted by teeny

And I would defend you somewhat if they started. Cos I have the opposite symbol and all.

Thanks, you're kind.


And thanks vicky7, yep, different crowds indeed.

Ok, about the story...

Well, i think Alex and Anna are the perfect example that when people can't naturally have children, there is sometimes a good reason, they are unfit! Parents who have a favorite are no parents at all.

And i stand by my point that Yulia is a bitch, so Lena is remotely connected to the incident and she asks that she be thrown out of the house? Wow, talk about over reacting.

Lena shouldn't try to speak to Yulia, she did nothing wrong and it's Yulia who is totally over reacting, it's Yulia who should be ashamed of what she's doing to her sister, having her thrown out of the house, that's so harsh.
Lena should just leave with pride (but Lenas never listen to me so...)

And when the little bro will hear that Lena was thrown out, he'll hate Yulia and her parents even more.

[tatu_rocs]

too cute i want a lil brother there much more funnier!!

[teeny]

Originally Posted by haku

Lena shouldn't try to speak to Yulia, she did nothing wrong and it's Yulia who is totally over reacting

think the problem could be that Yulia may think that Lena was in on the matter of handing out the flyers. But we have to wait and see..

You have to watch your steps at every forum though.. no matter what the blue icon says. I mean there are things one can say at one forum you can't say at the other and vice versa. It all comes down to the people there. Think the difference is that we know more about eachother in here to make the conversations run smoothly even when discussing things.

[tatu_rocks]

aww, I hope Yulia will try to listen to Lena, I mean, if they have always been there to support each other why is Yulia not giving her a chance to sort things out, I think that's even worse than making those flyers, well not that bad, but still

I like the way you write Vicky7, with many details it makes me imagine I'm almost there.

And little Thomas, mmm I don't know if I would like him, even if he was kinder, but that's me being selfish and being the youngest child, lol but yeah, he's kind of funny, if only he wasn't funny by being mean to others

Thanks for having updates so continuosly, it's always nice to have new chapters to read see you!

[haku]

Originally Posted by teeny

think the problem could be that Yulia may think that Lena was in on the matter of handing out the flyers.

Hmmm, maybe... but if she thinks that then she's not very bright... when she found Lena, Lena was "prising some flyers off a group of lower six form boys". If Lena was *taking* the flyers, it's obvious she wasn't *giving* them.
Anyway, that just shows that trying to be helpful is rarely a good idea, it often bites you in the ass. Lena should have minded her own business and let the flyers where they were.

Originally Posted by teeny

You have to watch your steps at every forum though.

That's true. Xena225 is a mod of the Tatu section now over there and she's not kidding, she has already warned me 2 or 3 times in a week for being off-topic, and she uses that angry smilie, eek. I've had so many arguments with her during the last year, now that she's a mod i should simply stop posting because i'll end up in trouble, lol, and i've already been banned once over there, next time it will probably be permanent. (No offense meant though, i know she's your friend.)

[teeny]

Originally Posted by haku

If Lena was *taking* the flyers, it's obvious she wasn't *giving* them

well she walked in on Lena stuffing down the flyers in her back.. so how would one be able to tell it it was going up or down
Either way: she's overreacting

Originally Posted by haku

No offense meant though, i know she's your friend.

No offense taken, Pat. And I'm not in the news section to avoid getting into trouble aswell. Not that I think I would get in trouble myself, but I would have trouble with staying neutral

[vicky7]

Hi guys! Thanks for posting in here, thank god there's now a bit of life in this thread! But just one question where's denial? Anyhow, here's an update.

Love Vicky



Chapter 3 part 5

Upon leaving Thomas’ room Lena hesitated outside her own bedroom doorway listening to Anna soothing a sobbing Yulia. She had told Alex she wouldn’t go to see Yulia but she couldn’t walk away when she could hear her crying like that. She would not be able to rest until Yulia told her she wasn’t mad with her.
She tried the doorknob and was surprised to find the door unlocked. She hesitantly put her head around the door. “Yuls, can I come in?”

“NO, GO AWAY!” Yulia screeched hysterically turning her head to meet Lena’s eyes with an expression loaded with hatred. “I DON’T WANT TO SEE YOU EVER AGAIN!”

“But I haven’t done anything Yulia.”

“IT’S ALWAYS YOU AND THOMAS AGAINST ME. I HOPE YOU’RE BOTH SATISFIED NOW!”

“But Yulia…”

“Just leave, can’t you see you’re upsetting her even more!” Anna interjected her features set in utter distain of Lena.

Someone grabbed hold of Lena’s arm from behind. “What did I tell you Lena?” Alex said towering over her.

“I’m sorry, I just wanted to see Yulia…”

“Well, I don’t want see you!” Yulia spat out the words before rolling over on her bed to face the wall.

Anna spoke first before Lena had the chance to work out what she wanted to say to Yulia. “I think you should leave now don’t you?”

Lena slumped against the doorframe dejectedly; Anna was going to get her way again. “Ok, I’m going.”

She lumbered down the stairs and grabbed her overnight bag and car keys and went to the cloakroom to get her coat. Oblivious to Anna and Alex’s knowledge, she heard them talking in the adjacent kitchen.

“She gone now?” Anna asked Alex. Lena stood perfectly still, she would have to wait for them to move from the kitchen before she left, she didn’t relish the prospect of another argument, she already felt exhausted.

“Yes.”

Lena heard one of the wooden kitchen chair scrape along the tiled floor as Anna sat down. “Oh Alex, what we going to do?”

“I really don’t know.” She heard him say sadly.

“Sometimes I wonder why we let ourselves in for all this,” she sighed heavily, “I’m not sure if it’s a good idea if Thomas stays with us after this.”

“You mean you want to put him back into care?” Alex sought clarification.

“I’m not sure if I can raise an eight year old pervert. If he’s like this now, what is he going to be like in a few years time? Jailbail, that’s what, just like Lena.” She said scornfully, the hatred with her voice unequivocal.

Alex forgot himself and rushed to Lena’s defence. The poor kid couldn’t help the fact she had come from a bad family background, what had happened to her was unforgivable. “Isn’t that a bit severe?”

“No, I don’t think so, the pair of them are more than I can take.” Anna said with an air of inevitability to her voice. “I’ve had enough.”

“So you want to send Thomas back into care, what about Lena?”

“She’s eighteen now, she’s old enough to care for herself perhaps if we give her a little money to start her off…”

Lena couldn’t listen anymore; to hear all that she had known for thirteen years was to be shattered was too much to take. She was no better off than she had been all those years ago, just as frightened, just as angry and without Yulia twice as alone.

[teeny]

wow.. this is getting worse even.. getting kicked out of home.. damn

Vicky, I have no idea where denial is. I haven't seen her around at all lately.

[haku]

Originally Posted by teeny

I have no idea where denial is.

Didn't she say she was going on vacation in one of the threads about Russian music? I think so.


About the story...

Well, i don't have much to add...

Yulia is obviously a spoiled bitch who has no feelings for her foster siblings, asking that your foster sister be kicked out of the house, for whatever reason, is unbelievably cruel and coldhearted.

There was a good reason for Anna to be unable to have children naturally, she's totally unfit to be a mother. All she wanted was a pretty blue-eyed girl who could pass for her natural child, pathetic woman, but she's as cruel and coldhearted as Yulia so they go well together, that's for sure.

Not much to say about Alex, he does what Anna says. When he grabbed Lena i thought he was going to be violent with her for a moment.

I’m not sure if I can raise an eight year old pervert.

I'm not sure you can raise anyone maybe a poodle.

And pleeeeeeze, he's not a pervert. Every boy who has an older sister tries to see her naked, that's his best chance to see what a naked female body looks like, that doesn't mean that he wants her sexually, it's just curiosity, and as long as it doesn't go further than peeking it's not "perverted".


Lena is devastated, poor girl.

[tatu_rocks]

Man, I don't know what would be happening inside my head if I were in Lena's position first, she loses her natural family for some reason, and now that's about to happen again, and what's really upseting is that at least the first time it didn't seem avoidable but now there's options, I think. I feel that I'm understanding her behavior a little bit more, I just hope she's strong enough not to close herself in even more than she has already.

[tatu_rocs]

will she leave!mystery

[vicky7]

Hi guys, thanks for the feedback. Only a very short update tonight, I'm extremely tired today so not at my best creatively but still here's a little something...

Vicky
x


Chapter 3 part 6

She could still hear the crackling noise as she attempted to walk at an even pace to her car, only to be startled by an almighty bang not too far in the distance. She was in no doubt where it had come from and this was only reinforced by the smoke and cinders she saw billowing up into the darkening sky.

She felt deflated, no better than she had felt before. What she had done would not help, in fact, it would probably accentuate the situation further but she had a knack for doing that, her life was not crumbling around her without reason.

There was only one reason she could think of and she despised herself for it, despised that…man. She hated the parts of him that she saw so dominantly within herself, the parts she wanted to expel, to have surgically removed from her being. But they were ingrained in her essence, a constant reminder of another time, a place she was still entrapped in so many years later.

Maybe it would have been better if she had died that day, then the legacy would have died along with her, the anger and hate never allowed to breed. She would have had peace then, she would not have to live with the consequences, she would be with her family, wherever their spirits had gone to lie. But she was still alive and she needed to be somewhere else fast, she couldn’t be caught…

[tatu_rocs]

ha ha good good

[teeny]

Originally Posted by tatu_rocs

Maybe it would have been better if she had died that day

Think someone should locate her before she starts thinking things again

[Veggie Delite]

*is confused*

too much for my little brain. update soon, don't let me feel stupid