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Lena sat with her head tilted back against the wall, the cold cup of coffee in the Styrofoam cup still untouched in her hands. She had been waiting for four hours and still she still hadn't been allowed to see Yulia. Family only. Didn't they realize that Yulia was everything to her? Damn doctors. They only understood blood relation and what they could see under a microscope. A single tear trickled down her pale cheek. She felt so utterly lost. Ivan had come up to her an hour ago and had told her she needed to go to Germany alone to perform and accept the award for best international newcomer. Damn him! How did he expect her to leave Yulia? She didn't even know what was wrong with her, she hadn't even seen Yulia and he wanted her to skip off to some foreign country to perform at an award show she didn't give a fuck about.
But Ivan was still making her go.
More confusion and pain pushed down on Lena's small shoulders.
Trepidation filled Lena as she put her hand on the wide hospital door and pushed the handle down and slowly cracked the door open. A blue sterile curtain blocked her way and she heard the bleep of several machines and the low murmuring of voices. More fear gripped Lena as she clenched her hands around the door afraid to go in any further. Below the curtain she saw a pair of black shoes and black slacks. She froze as the curtain was jerked back to reveal a middle-aged man with silver hair who jumped almost as much as Lena. Her eyes found Yulia's in a second as she laid back in the hospital bed. An IV needle was in her arm dripping fluid into her body as a heart monitor attached to her chest beat steadily. She gave Lena a loving smile
"Who are you?" The doctor asked coldly blocking Yulia from site.
"She is my partner." Lena said slightly shocked that the doctor would treat her this way.
"Yes I know she is your singing partner, but you are not allowed in here unless you are family."
"Let her the fuck in!" Yulia screamed, "She is my Partner!"
The doctor bristled at being told what to do. He was about to push Lena out when Ivan came up behind Lena accompanied with Yulia's Mother
Ivan raised an eyebrow
"Is there a problem?"
He only shook his head and walked slowly from the room.
"Well give you a few minutes, " Ivan said softly as he closed the door behind Lena.
Yulia smiled again and held her hand out for Lena who rushed forward and gently took it sliding her fingers through Yulia's slightly smaller ones. Linking them together. Before bending and placing a gentle kiss against Yulia's lips
"Are you alright?” Lena asked softly stroking the back of Yulia's hand with her thumb. Yulia looked over her girlfriend. She looked done in. Her eyes were smudged with dark circles and her translucent plain skin was now pasty white with shock.
"I should be asking you that Lenaka." Yulia replied squeezing Lena's hand
"But I am okay. They put me on a morphine drip so I don't feel the pain."
Lena swallowed back her tears as she glanced at the floor. Pain welling over her.
"What is it?" Yulia pleaded. She had never seen Lena so upset before.
"I just wish it was me." She sobbed "And now Ivan wants me to go to Germany and I don't even know what's wrong with you!" All of the emotions Lena had suffered the last eight hours was paying its toll on her. She was slowly shattering from the inside out.
"Lena look at me." Yulia said softly, her voice so achingly gentle and compelling Lena had to obey as she meet the oceanic blue depths.
"You have to go to Germany. We cannot miss this show. And since I can't go you have to be there for both of us." Lena let out another shuddering sob and Yulia felt her lungs choke with emotion. She didn't want her to leave anymore than Lena did. But she couldn't let Lena just sit around a hospital waiting to hear what was wrong with her. Lena would drive herself mad analyzing everything in her head.
"Please go? For me?"
Those two words clinched it as Lena nodded and still crying bent and hugged Yulia who still groggy and ill pulled Lena onto the bed with her. Willing herself to not take back what she said. Swallowing her own fears she bent and laid all of her trust in Lena, in a soft and gentle kiss tasting her lovers' tears.
The familiar sounds of everyone backstage and the rushed pace that everything moved in. Lena looked around her feeling uneasy. This didn't feel right. Everything about this was wrong. She swallowed the bite of apple that felt like nothing more than a huge lump in her throat. Tears welled at the back of her eyes and she had to take several breaths to gain control of herself.
Damn it!
She needed to be in Moscow with Yulia. Not here. Not with out her.
She looked at the green apple in her hand and threw the rest of the fruit in the trash. She was going to be sick. She only had an hour to get changed, do hair and make up and warm up. But God, how she dreaded it.
Her phone began to vibrate and in desperation she dug it out of her jean pocket. Hitting the receive button she saw it was Yulia.
"Yulika?"
There was a long pause of static on the other end then the phone lines cleared.
"Lena? Are you there?" Lena closed her eyes, and clenched them tight. If she imagined hard enough it was like Yulia was with her.
"I'm here."
"Lena I love you."
She nearly choked over whelmed with emotions.
"Look I cant talk long but don’t worry about tonight okay? Just do what you love to do best, and then come home to me okay?"
Some of the tension that was knotted in Lena's stomach was released.
"I will. I love you "
Lena gripped the phone tighter "feeling" Yulia smile on the other end
"I got to go. They want to run more tests on me. I'll have Ivan call you later. "
"Bye.." Lena replied wanting nothing more than to crawl through the telephone back into Yulia's arms.
"Leanoka, have fun for me too." Yulia said as an after thought before the phone line went dead. Lena took another breath as she sat down in the make up chair lost in thought. She maybe without Yulia but no matter what - Yulia was right. She had a job to do.
Yulia lightly wrapped her fingers through Lena's and gave it a soft squeeze. It was three days following the Comet awards and, only one more day until Yulia was to be released from the hospital.
"Are you feeling okay?" Lena asked as she leaned against her girlfriend's bed her head resting on Yulia's leg looking up at her.
Yulia couldn't help but repress a smile as she ran her fingers though Lena's locks, playing with them as she stroked her cheek.
"Yeah, I'm better now."
Yulia relaxed against the pillow and closed her eyes remembering the past few days. She had refused the doctors to take her into surgery until Lena had performed. She had been amazing. Yulia had never seen them perform live before and watching Lena, made her realize just how much more amazing Lena was. Her eyes stung as she remembered the pain that had overwhelmed her. That she hadn't been there with her. It had hurt her almost worse then her physical pain.
Yulia shifted on the mattress pulling a face as her stitches pulled. Damn it hurt!
"Yulia?"
Yulia opened her eyes and looked into the dark green pools that were Lena's eyes.
"Yes?"
"I missed you. I have never felt so alone in my life."
Something in Yulia's heart clenched. Lena's vulnerability a tangible thing.
She clung to Lena's hand harder.
"Well I promise. I won't be letting you perform anymore without me. Or let you do anything alone."
Lena lifted her head from her pillow and gently lowered her mouth to Yulia's. Brushing her lips teasingly over the soft lips. Yulia swallowed a soft moan and pulled Lena closer.
A promise was a promise............
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