[freddie]

I'm in the middle of - don't even know if I should call it that, but for the lack of a better word - existential crisis. I can't even talk about it with anyone else, because no one gives a damn about things like this. What I'm about to ponder here will truly cement my status as the boy who asks questions nobody asked.

I've been having problems with comprehension of anything which doesn't revolve around our limited understanding of linear time. I base my whole existance and meaning around the concept of time being an ongoing river. Think about it - what is the meaning of evolving, learning and even experiencing new things if time is infact not linear. But okay - you can easily argue that life has no meaning in the first place. Still.... I want to understand the concept of unlinear time. Them as a whole. Time which just... IS. One which doesn't run - it's just THERE. Like a huge lump of dimensional matter. Just like space is another such lump. Theory of relativity and consequent realizations that time STOPS at certain physical extremes (light speed, centres of black-holes), shook out belief that time is as stable and constant as we thought it could be. As we needed it to be.

Baaah... *senses people scratching their heads and looking out windows in boredom* I'm having a hard time expressing what I want to say. (what's new? :P) Check it out... as we know there are many dimensions out there - each a home to another paralel universe and each with it's very own concept of time. As we go higher and higher in the hierarchy of dimensions and paralel universes we're boud to run into something, which is giving me headaches just thinking about it - a dimension where there is NO time yet ALL time at once. A dimension where all the time - past, future and present are just one single moment - where everything that ever happened is NOW. The whole history and future are not a line which extends from here to eternity but rather a closed circle of the eternal MOMENT. This eternal moment crumbles in lower dimensions up to a point where we get a sense (an illusion) that time is actually linear - just like we're under an illusion that a movie sequence we're watching is happening NOW , eventhough we're well aware it was shoot a long time ago and the script has been written out for years before the actual moment of us experiencing it in the cinema.

I'm sure it makes perfect sense for the scientists, but it's mind-boggling to a mortal like me. Just think of the consequences - if time is not linear and there is no past, future or present to speak of, what does that make us and our lives? As I already mentioned - is there a point to spiritual and mental growth when we're just a finished script that's been thrown on some heavenly producer's table? Just like knowledge for instance. Knowledge is eternal... but what is the point of it when there's no timely progression of it. You know what I mean? What I'm trying to say is - doesn't the existance of eternal now and time which doesn't progress linearly mean stalling by default? Stuck in a rut? Isn't that the sheer essence of absurdity which we call life?


Sorry about that. In next weeks mysteries in history I'll cover the eternal enigma of why David Hasselhoff never shaved his chest-hair (note that he was the only Baywatch cast-member who never did). *cough*Alpha-male syndrom*cough* David: "I'm a male animal and a pack leader! I need my fur! Grrrrrr."