[iguessilikeemo]

“ Uh…are you hungry? We could get
some food.”

“ Ok. Let’s go then.”

“ Uh, ok. Is pizza ok?”

“ Yes. It’s fine, but can we please just leave!”

“ Okay!” Lena rushed Ivana and Yulia down the stairs as she quickly grabbed her keys, and walked out the door.

There was a deafening silence in the car as the three girls drove, until Yulia dared to speak.

“ So Ivana, we control you, eh?
Whatever we want you do?”

“ Yeah something like that…”

Looking smug Yulia crossed her arms over he chest and leaned back into her seat. “ Sweet.”

Silence once again enveloped the car until they arrived at their destination.

Ivana was disgusted at the building before her. “ Cletus’s Deep Fried Pizza Hoedown?!”

“ WOO HOO!!! LET THE HOEDOWN BEGIN!!!”

“ YULIA SHUT UP!!!” Lena yelled at the girl that was jumping up and down in the back seat before turning to Ivana.

“ Uh yeah, it’s actually really good. We can go someplace else if you like…”

“ No…this could be interesting…”

All three girls got strange stares as they made their way to the restaurant, but while Lena and Yulia looked embarrassed, Ivana kept on strutting. Yulia couldn’t help but whisper to herself, “ I like big butts and I cannot lie. You other Russians can’t deny, that when I girl walks in with an itty bitty waist and shoves that round thing in your face, you get-”

“ Howdy and welcome to Cletus’s Deep Fried Pizza Hoedown! How many people are joining the hoedown this evening?” The waiter had a horribly obnoxious and clearly fake Southern drawl.

“ Shut up Roland, we come here every week, you really don’t need to do that.”

Unimpressed Roland said, “ Someone’s on the rag now aren’t they?” in a condescending tone.

“ Roland, we have three people. Seat us or you’re balls are going bye bye.”

Extending his hand the young man showed the girls to their table. “ Is there anything else you need Czar Lena?”

“ No fart knocker, you can go.”

“ Thank you, your highness.” Roland bowed towards Lena before walking away.

“ I HATE that guy. Hey…Ivana can you kill people?”

“ No.”

“ Shit.” Discouraged, Lena decided to look at her menu.

About 10 minutes passed until Roland, the waiter, came back to take everyone’s order.

“ So what do y’all want?”

Yulia started. “ I’ll have the deep fried pickle pizza with a side of Oreos and coleslaw…oh and a Slippery Nipple!”

“ And for the pretty older woman?”

“ A bottle of Stoli and a large glass with ice.”

“ Understandably. And for you Czar Lena?”

“ How about a glass of SHUT THE HELL UP and…hmmm…chicken finger and bacon pizza.”

Ivana was bored so she decided that she should ad least try to get to know her creators.

She asked how old they were and then plastered a fake smile on her face. Yulia was preoccupied with the sugar at the table so Lena answered for her.

“ I’m 18 and Yulia’s 17. We’re both seniors though. How old are you?”

“ Legal. What do you do for fun?”

“ We both really like to sing, play piano, and write poetry. Yulia likes scaring little kids too.”

Looking up from what she was going Yulia nodded and grinned evilly.

Slightly panicked Ivana asked, “ Is she safe? She doesn’t have rabies does she?”

Lena smiled at Yulia and mussed up her hair, then replied, “ Yeah, she’s okay. Kind of weird. But okay.”

“ Good…so are you guys virgins?”

“ Umm…what do you consider virginity?”

“ Have you guys fucked yet?” Ivana was slightly annoyed at Lena’s stupid question, but when Lena blushed she wasn’t sure if it was because they had engaged in sexual activity or if they really were virgins. The red head opened her mouth to answer, but was interrupted by the arrival of their food.