darkwolf131
10-10-2006, 20:38
Hey everyone...you might remember me from Tatu Fatal. Well that site's dead, but I thought you guys would enjoy my story.
Once upon a time, a man named Snoop Dogg lived in a small kingdom with his two daughters and stepdaughter. He hated his stepdaughter. Her name was Yulia. His daughters, Paris Hilton and Jennifer Lopez also hated Yulia. So they treated her like a slave. She didn't have a bed, so she had to sleep near the fire and get all dirty with the cinders. Because of this, they cruelly nicknamed her 'CinderYulia'. Snoop gave his two daughters everything they could ever want and more - Louis Vuitton purses, beautiful custom gowns, and only the finest food. For poor Yulia, there was nothing but rags and scraps. It sucked. A lot.
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Across the kingdom, a king and queen lived with their daughter, Princess Lena. Princess Lena had just turned 21, and to celebrate, she was having a huge ball. But this wasn't just any ball. You see, in those days, it was customary to marry at age 21. So this ball was for Lena to find a suitable spouse. Now, the princess had a very good relationship with her parents and had told them that she was a lesbian when she was fifteen. Her parents realized what a treat this was, because if their daughter married another woman, they could score a huge dowry! So they planned a huge ball for their daughter's birthday and invited every noblewoman in the country.
************************************************** ***************
"THere's gonna be a bizall at the pizallace," Snoop Dogg announced as he read the invitation that arrived.
"That's hot," Paris commented.
"Yeah. Sizzays that only the finest ladies in the lizzand are invited. Yulia, that means not you."
Yulia frowned.
"Damn, we gotta get to tha mall then! I needa new dress!" J.Lo shouted.
"Let's go. Tinkerbell wants a new bracelet," her sister added. "Daddy, take us to the mall."
So Snoop Dogg, Paris Hilton and J.Lo hopped in the Benz and went to the mall, leaving poor Yulia alone.
"Oh boo hoo, I don't get to go to the ball," Yulia cried. "Boo hoo, I'll never get to meet Princess Lena or eat fancy finger food or anything." She wailed, her tears dripping into the fireplace. "And nobody loves me, I'll have to live here forever with Snoop Dogg and his stupid daughters slaving night and day in this kitchen!" One big, fat teardrop fell from her cheek onto a dying ember. Suddenly, the ember burst to life.
Yulia gasped.
The fire grew, and out of it came a man clad in black.
"Yulia!" he bellowed.
Yulia looked up at him in fear.
He stepped out of the flame into the kitchen.
"H-hello?" asked Yulia.
"My name is Voltaire. I am your fairy godfather."
"I-I didn't know I had a fairy godfather."
"Well you do."
Yulia didn't know what to think. If he was her fairy godfather, where was he when she was forced into domestic slavery!? Where was he when Paris Hilton and J.Lo were getting everything they wanted and she got nothing?!? Where was he when her mother died?!? Yulia looked up at him expectantly.
"...yes?"
"And I'd like to send you to the ball."
"Why?"
"Because I like you. Now, would you like to go or not?"
Yulia thought about it. Of course, her first reaction was 'oh hell yeah!' But something about this guy seemed fishy. He arrived through her fireplace, dressed like Satan, looked like he hadn't shaved in a week, and was offering to take her to the ball. Something didn't click.
"So...Voltaire...if you really are my fairy godfather, then tell me this. What did I make for dinner last Tuesday?"
"Porkchops and applesauce."
"But what did I eat?"
"Cat food."
He was right. She did eat cat food. Paris ate the last chop.
"So...umm...Mr. Voltaire...may I ask you something else?"
"Ask me anything you please, honey."
"If you're supposed to watch over and protect me, why did you let my mother die?"
Voltaire stared at her blankly. "Uhh......." he hesitated.
"Well?" asked Yulia.
"Err...all in good time, my pet. All in good time. Now, we need to get you ready for the ball!"
"Yeah...the ball's tomorow," Yulia reminded him.
Once upon a time, a man named Snoop Dogg lived in a small kingdom with his two daughters and stepdaughter. He hated his stepdaughter. Her name was Yulia. His daughters, Paris Hilton and Jennifer Lopez also hated Yulia. So they treated her like a slave. She didn't have a bed, so she had to sleep near the fire and get all dirty with the cinders. Because of this, they cruelly nicknamed her 'CinderYulia'. Snoop gave his two daughters everything they could ever want and more - Louis Vuitton purses, beautiful custom gowns, and only the finest food. For poor Yulia, there was nothing but rags and scraps. It sucked. A lot.
************************************************** *********
Across the kingdom, a king and queen lived with their daughter, Princess Lena. Princess Lena had just turned 21, and to celebrate, she was having a huge ball. But this wasn't just any ball. You see, in those days, it was customary to marry at age 21. So this ball was for Lena to find a suitable spouse. Now, the princess had a very good relationship with her parents and had told them that she was a lesbian when she was fifteen. Her parents realized what a treat this was, because if their daughter married another woman, they could score a huge dowry! So they planned a huge ball for their daughter's birthday and invited every noblewoman in the country.
************************************************** ***************
"THere's gonna be a bizall at the pizallace," Snoop Dogg announced as he read the invitation that arrived.
"That's hot," Paris commented.
"Yeah. Sizzays that only the finest ladies in the lizzand are invited. Yulia, that means not you."
Yulia frowned.
"Damn, we gotta get to tha mall then! I needa new dress!" J.Lo shouted.
"Let's go. Tinkerbell wants a new bracelet," her sister added. "Daddy, take us to the mall."
So Snoop Dogg, Paris Hilton and J.Lo hopped in the Benz and went to the mall, leaving poor Yulia alone.
"Oh boo hoo, I don't get to go to the ball," Yulia cried. "Boo hoo, I'll never get to meet Princess Lena or eat fancy finger food or anything." She wailed, her tears dripping into the fireplace. "And nobody loves me, I'll have to live here forever with Snoop Dogg and his stupid daughters slaving night and day in this kitchen!" One big, fat teardrop fell from her cheek onto a dying ember. Suddenly, the ember burst to life.
Yulia gasped.
The fire grew, and out of it came a man clad in black.
"Yulia!" he bellowed.
Yulia looked up at him in fear.
He stepped out of the flame into the kitchen.
"H-hello?" asked Yulia.
"My name is Voltaire. I am your fairy godfather."
"I-I didn't know I had a fairy godfather."
"Well you do."
Yulia didn't know what to think. If he was her fairy godfather, where was he when she was forced into domestic slavery!? Where was he when Paris Hilton and J.Lo were getting everything they wanted and she got nothing?!? Where was he when her mother died?!? Yulia looked up at him expectantly.
"...yes?"
"And I'd like to send you to the ball."
"Why?"
"Because I like you. Now, would you like to go or not?"
Yulia thought about it. Of course, her first reaction was 'oh hell yeah!' But something about this guy seemed fishy. He arrived through her fireplace, dressed like Satan, looked like he hadn't shaved in a week, and was offering to take her to the ball. Something didn't click.
"So...Voltaire...if you really are my fairy godfather, then tell me this. What did I make for dinner last Tuesday?"
"Porkchops and applesauce."
"But what did I eat?"
"Cat food."
He was right. She did eat cat food. Paris ate the last chop.
"So...umm...Mr. Voltaire...may I ask you something else?"
"Ask me anything you please, honey."
"If you're supposed to watch over and protect me, why did you let my mother die?"
Voltaire stared at her blankly. "Uhh......." he hesitated.
"Well?" asked Yulia.
"Err...all in good time, my pet. All in good time. Now, we need to get you ready for the ball!"
"Yeah...the ball's tomorow," Yulia reminded him.